Finding Faith Part I

Faith can be such a tricky, elusive thing at times.  As we fall, stumble, paw, and claw our way up the seemingly shear ascent of our own personal barriers sometimes the blood and bruises makes us lose faith in everything from ourselves, to our fellow man, and even in God.

People have often said to me in tumultuous times that there is a reason for everything—that God has a plan, and these struggles are a part of it.  I don’t know that I believe this is true.  I think, sometimes, bad things just happen.  And to believe that such seemingly senseless and terrible tragedies are a part of a larger plan, to me, almost makes God seem cruel and cold…or it is just someone trying to remove blame from themselves.

If God is truly the loving, benevolent being that I’ve learned for so many years about, I cannot believe that He, in is omnipotence, omniscience, and omnipresence could be so limited as to teach those that love, serve, and seek to know Him with such a heavy hand. 

As a person who has a great appreciation for science and the arts, I find myself ceaselessly amazed.  When I carefully look at the world around me, I see the painstakingly complex processes that occur in nature.  Yes, scientifically, many of the natural events can be explained and even reproduced but the by-product of both the complex and simple interactions is breathtaking and stunning.  Every interaction—down to the molecular and subatomic, produces something that as both a scientist and an artist, would take a great deal of care, attention, and dedication to reproduce.  Scientists and artists alike feel such a connection with that sort of work that it becomes an extension of themselves.  Can you imagine the kind of love and dedication would need to be invested to create a world, moreover, all of creation?!

So, I don’t think that the Creator makes these bad things happen.  I don’t believe that any being would want to destroy the produce of their clearly deep love and devotion.  I don’t believe that the Creator of us all would want us to suffer or labor aimlessly. 

Sometimes seemingly illogical and senseless things happen—even in nature.  Things don’t always evolve or change in the way that we, humans, perceive to be best or ideal.  But even then, whether these events are divinely deigned or not, nothing is lost…ever…it is just redirected…carefully placed somewhere else…we have only to look closely to find it again.

Although my faith is often fragile, my hope that there is someone, somewhere, watching over us is constant.  And it is in that hope, that I continue to send my prayers and labors up to God. If creation itself is any indication of the nature of the Creator, although we may not understand how or why the world and every part of it is as it is, I think we all can take comfort in knowing that in the end, whatever happens, knowing why will never be as important as simply knowing that

Life and Creation will always be precious and beautiful…and none of that beauty is ever gone…sometimes you just need to look for it in new and unexpected places.